There is a purpose for every marriage relationship but most couples don't have any clue of what the purpose of their marriage is. Ask a typical prospective groom, “What is the purpose and goal of your marriage?” you will see him shifts his feet around, and hear him saying, “I don’t know. I just love her.” Or ask a typical bride-to-be the same question, and see her rolling her eyes, giggling, and saying, “I have found the man who will worship me and take good care of me for the rest of my life.” Go ahead and ask a married man, “Where do you hope your marriage will be in the next 5, 10, 20, 30 years?” You will hear him telling you his career development goals. Then ask a married woman the same question. You will hear her telling you her plans for her children. Hmmm! If none of the answers given to the questions above is correct in response to goal or purpose of a marriage relationship, what then is purpose of marriage? What do we mean by purpose-driven marriage? How can one build a purpose driven marriage?

I. God, Marriage and Purpose:

God established the first home and gave them, among others, the task of “filling” the earth (Gen. 1:27, 28). Adam and Eve fulfilled that purpose by having Cain, Abel, Seth “and other sons and daughter.” (Gen. 5:3). The family of Abram was established and called so that all peoples on earth will be blessed through them (Gen. 12:3b). God’s purpose for the marriage relationship of Jacob and Leah was to establish the 12 tribes of Israel through them. For that purpose, Leah was made a very fertile woman (Gen. 29:1-30:24). Don’t you see that for every marriage relationship there is a specific assignment? Couples that discover the purpose of their relationship are known for something, for instance, Jabal was known as the father of those who live in tents and raise livestock (Gen. 4:20); Jubal was known as the father of all who play stringed instruments and pipes (Gen. 4:21); and Tubal-Cain was known as the father of those who forged all kinds of tools out of bronze and iron (Gen 4:22). God has a specific assignment for every marriage relationship including yours. Have you discovered it?

II. Purpose-Driven Marriage:

The term “purpose-driven marriage” describes a couple that does not only have a basic understanding of the specific assignment God has for them and the kind of marriage they need to build but also know what it will take to make it happen. It describes couples that are willing to work together toward the common goal.

III. Building a Purpose-Driven Marriage:

The following steps will be helpful in building a purpose-driven marriage.

1. Understand God's Purpose: The very first step in building a purpose-driven marriage is to understand the biblical truth that God designed and placed each of us here on earth for five “general” purposes in mind: worship, fellowship, discipleship, ministry, and missions.

2. Discover Your Life Purpose. The second step is to discover your life purpose, that is, the specific way(s) by which God wants you to fulfil His general purposes. Without this understanding, your life—and your marriage—will be difficult, complicated, and exhausting. So, please, discover first your purpose before your spouse.

3. Search for and Choose Someone You Share Same Goal: When it is time to choose your life partner, make a purposeful choice. Search for, not just, someone living purpose-driven lives but someone who also shares your life purpose. And once both of you are living purpose-driven lives—then guess what happens? Your marriage becomes a purpose-driven marriage! While this does not suggest a perfect relationship with no differences, the common goal that you share shall keep you together until the time you will be able to accept your differences and appreciate them.

Conclusion:

The importance of building a purpose-driven marriage cannot be over emphasized. Couples that have no valid, defined, and acknowledged purpose for their relationship will have problem keeping the relationship; whereas, couples who live for a greater purpose — together — thrive.